12 things to expect from Secret Cinema presents Star Wars The Empire Strikes Back in London

Its news offering, an epic screening of Star Wars: Episode V – The Empire Strikes Back, features vast sets (plural) and legions of am-dram “aliens” to transport you to a galaxy far far away.

While Local London hasn't been lucky enough to bag an invite (booo!), the Press Association has – and here are 12 things you can expect if you go along too.

Note: There are no huge spoilers in this article, but if you intend to go and would rather everything be a surprise then perhaps stop reading now.

1. The chance to be a genuine member of the Rebel Alliance

Or at least to dress like one and be given a cool rebel name. These come as part of the initial registration process, way in advance of the actual event. The names are suitably daft sci-fi mumbo jumbo. Ours were Raymus Hannica and Rha Quadrinaros.

2. Total dedication from all the staff – to the point it can start getting a little confusing

Expect everyone from the stewards to security staff to adopt a persona. Which is cool, until (like we did) you want to quickly nip out and the only reason the bouncer gives you for refusing is that he is “an Imperial guard and these are Imperial orders”.

3. Bewilderment from some of your fellow rebels

Actually this constant struggle to keep up your rebel identity can serve up some of the funniest moments. Like the guy who was asked his name by a rebel leader. “Scott,” he replied (we assume truthfully). “No, your rebel name,” demanded his ‘commander’. Clearly having utterly forgotten, Scott ventured: “Scotia”. In the moment, it was very amusing.

4. A much lighter wallet by the end

Sure you paid £70 to get in, but that doesn’t mean your night is going to be cheap. After all the initial excitement you’ll be thrown straight into an arena of petty capitalism, packed full of food stalls and bars vying for your trade.

The fees are probably best described as “expensive London market prices”.

5. Some particularly ingenious sales pitches

All we’re saying is it feels very strange for someone to open a conversation by asking what galaxy you’re from, when their end goal is to sell you some over-priced green tea. Jedi mind powers indeed.

6. Staggering attention to detail

If there’s one thing here that is really impressive it’s the set design. Every wall, every stall, every individual artefact has clearly had a lot of thought (and no doubt a lot of film watching) put into it. During the busiest times this is often quite hard to appreciate, so consider having a look around again once the film’s over.

7. Action kicking off all over the place

Anyone who’s been to a Secret Cinema event before will know they love putting on classic re-enactments from the film. Tonight these went into hyperdrive – you almost couldn’t move for Stormtroopers arresting someone, a land speeder nudging past you, or a Jawa trying to sell you something.

This all reaches a particularly epic crescendo – but we won’t spoil that for you.

8. Baffling sub-quests

If anyone managed to successfully complete any of the personalised plotlines they were set when they registered, we take our rebel pilot helmets off to you. We were told to take some seeds to a farm, but had no luck finding it – although we were kicked out of one room for not having a “bag of crystals” on us…

9. A genuinely alien atmosphere

We’re not kidding. In a bid to replicate an authentic alien planet, there’s enough dry ice and non-descript “aroma” in there to set off a few allergies if you’re unlucky.

10. Decent toilets

It’s a big event full of food and drink followed by a long film – facilities are a must. And they were there, so enough said.

11. Enthusiasm all round

Of course what really makes Secret Cinema special is the fans – and Star Wars fans were loving it. Any time a recognisable character appeared people cheered, whooped and occasionally hollered. Right at the start we heard a guy whisper to his mate: “We’re not even there yet, and this is already awesome.”

12. A really, really good film

But you knew that was coming already, didn’t you?

Secret Cinema present Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back will be showing *somewhere in London* until September 27. And you can still book tickets online.