Social media is ingrained into the daily lives of the majority of the developed world. It gives us access to more knowledge than the previous generations could ever have imagined and connects us with people from all around the world with ease. Social media allows everyone to have a voice and a platform – but is this all for better or worse?
People have always wanted to belong to something. It’s why we have communities, and on a smaller scale, friendship groups. When this desire to belong to something was kept offline, we developed cultures and traditions, which allowed us to have something to unite us with the people around us, while letting us keep our own personal traits and interests.
This desire is at its strongest amongst young people - who social media appeals to the most - so it makes sense that they would turn to find the type of person they want to be and who they want to associate with online. Everybody should (theoretically) be able to share the pros and cons of their hobbies and lifestyle online, so figuring yourself out should be simpler than ever. Right? Wrong.
Trends have always existed. People present themselves in a certain way for public approval, and then a new one rises, and people abandon the old one entirely. They’re a fun way of trying out new styles if managed well, though they can be expensive with the speed they change at. But something newer and much more energy consuming is rising – the aesthetic.
Aesthetics typically dictate how people dress and decorate their spaces completely, along with what music artists they listen to or even what they eat. There are many accounts that share tips on what to buy or wear if you want to be accepted into certain aesthetic groups or sub-groups, and bully those who don’t fit exactly into their image of how a fan of a certain aesthetic should act. A lot of their inspiration is also taken from reviving past trends, giving them a sense of superiority over those who choose to dress according to current trends. This makes them even more appealing to young people trying to figure themselves out. They often form communities which can become very tight knit, but also extremely toxic, leading to fans having no identity other than their aesthetic.
One of the most dangerous aesthetics, the ‘coquette’ aesthetic and its branches, often encourages a lifestyle similar to one depicted in music by the artist Lana del Ray. The coquette lifestyle, which is focused on young girls, romanticises smoking, eating disorders and relationships with much older men – all to the detriment of its fans.
A TikTok user said, ‘I thought the clothes were pretty and I liked the music so I started dressing that way. Really got into the community. Made a few friends from it too so that was all good. Then some of my friends started saying that I was a bit too big to be properly coquette. I like really wanted to be seen as coquette at that point so it hurt. Couple months later I had an eating disorder.’
Others claim that aesthetics are a great way to make friends and discover who you’d like to be, despite the lack of freedom in some aspects of life.
Another TikTok user said, ‘I found my closest friends online from liking the same aesthetics. They’re not harmful unless if you’re trying too hard to fit in, in my opinion.’ However, they did admit later on that they had to listen to genres their friends listened to so they wouldn’t get bullied for it, even though they didn’t enjoy that type of music at all.
The rise of aesthetics raises the question – how far are people willing to go to belong to something? How much of their identities are they willing to erase? And when will we start seeing the effects of this behaviour in our world?
